Alcohol Misuse and Child Custody: What Los Angeles Judges Look For
Allegations of alcohol misuse in a custody case can raise serious concerns, but they don’t automatically lead to supervised visits or a loss of custody. Courts don’t take away parenting rights lightly, and a single accusation isn’t enough. What matters is whether there’s a clear, ongoing risk to the child’s safety and well-being.
It’s important to understand what family law judges in Los Angeles actually look for.
In many cases, parents are able to reach agreements outside of court, especially when one party takes accountability and is willing to put safeguards in place. We’ve seen situations where a parent recognized the problem, got help, and created a safe, stable environment for their child, with the support of professionals and clear boundaries.
But not everyone is ready to acknowledge there’s an issue. When concerns are denied, minimized, or hidden, and no agreement can be reached, a judge can step in to issue court orders in the child’s best interest.
This post breaks down how Los Angeles judges evaluate alcohol-related concerns in custody cases — what kinds of evidence they consider, how they assess parenting risk, and what outcomes are most common. Whether you’re raising concerns or responding to them, understanding the court’s priorities can make all the difference.
Allegations Are Just the Start — Evidence Matters
If you claim the other parent has a drinking problem that impacts the children, the judge will want to know:
When and how often does this happen?
Are the children present or affected?
Can you back this up with documentation?
General statements like “He drinks a lot” or “She parties too much” won’t carry much weight in court. Judges need specific, documented evidence, such as texts, emails, videos, police reports, or witness statements.
One helpful strategy is to keep a written journal of concerning incidents, noting the dates, times, and what happened. These records are important not just for credibility, but also because it’s easy to forget details over time. A chronological list of incidents helps build a stronger case and can also help the parent see patterns more clearly as they unfold.
On the flip side, if you’re accused of alcohol misuse, you’ll need to demonstrate that your parenting is stable and safe. That might involve voluntarily submitting to testing (like Soberlink), engaging in counseling, or showing a pattern of responsible behavior.
A Real-World Example
Take, for example, a case where a father alleged that the mother routinely drank to the point of passing out, missed school pickups, acted erratically, and even drove under the influence. His case was strengthened by evidence: screenshots of concerning text messages, Ring camera footage showing her stumbling and yelling nonsensical epithets, police body-worn video footage, and photos of hidden alcohol bottles and property damage around the home.
In another case, we issued a subpoena to a bar the father had visited and obtained time-stamped video surveillance records showing that he consumed more than three drinks in under an hour — right before picking up their young child from daycare. We also secured the daycare’s sign-out sheets to confirm the timeline. That combination of documentation helped establish a clear, dangerous pattern.
In cases like this, although every situation is different, we typically submit a calm, fact-based declaration supported by exhibits. The focus is not just on alcohol use itself, but on how that behavior impacts the child’s safety and well-being. Judges have ordered monitored visits, alcohol testing, and other safeguards — not based on allegations alone, but on credible evidence and demonstrated risk.
What Judges Weigh Most Heavily
Every case is different, but judges commonly look for:
Patterns of behavior, not isolated incidents,
Impact on the child, not just on the other parent,
Credibility of both parties,
Willingness to cooperate (e.g., submit to testing or follow court orders),
Efforts to address the issue (e.g., rehab, therapy, or parenting classes).
They’re not looking to punish. The focus is protecting the child — which may mean temporary restrictions like:
Soberlink testing before and during visits,
Professionally monitored parenting time,
Alcohol or substance abuse treatment,
Court-ordered therapy or co-parenting counseling.
What to Do If Your Co-Parent Hides Their Alcohol Use
Some parents are highly functional and careful to hide their drinking, making it harder to prove. If you suspect misuse:
Start documenting subtle patterns — missed pickups, slurred speech, erratic messages,
Keep a journal of incidents with dates and incident descriptions — even if it feels minor in the moment, patterns become clearer over time,
Save any written or recorded communications that raise concern.
Most importantly, avoid confrontation. If safety is a concern, document and consult your attorney instead of confronting your co-parent directly.
What Soberlink Is — and How It Works
Soberlink is a remote alcohol monitoring system often used in custody cases involving alcohol concerns. Here’s how it works:
The parent takes a breathalyzer test at scheduled times,
The device uses facial recognition to confirm identity,
Results are sent instantly to a designated list (e.g., both attorneys, the other parent),
Missed or failed tests trigger automatic alerts.
Judges like Soberlink because it offers real-time monitoring and accountability without requiring constant supervision. It’s a protective measure that can give everyone more peace of mind while parenting time continues. Judges will often issue orders that a failed Soberlink test will lead to suspension of parenting time, or that a missed test constitutes a failed test.
How Judges Differentiate Between Occasional Drinking and Problematic Use
Not all drinking is considered problematic. Courts understand that many parents consume alcohol socially or moderately. The key questions are:
Is the drinking interfering with parenting responsibilities?
Is the child being exposed to unsafe situations?
Is there a history of risky behavior or legal consequences?
Is the parent willing to be transparent and responsible moving forward?
One glass of wine at dinner likely won’t raise concerns. Driving under the influence, however — or consistent intoxication during parenting time — absolutely will.
The court is looking for patterns that show risk, not isolated behavior without context.
For Parents Raising Concerns
If you're worried about your co-parent’s drinking, it’s essential to:
Keep records of incidents (dates, times, messages),
Avoid exaggeration or emotionally charged language,
Focus on how the issue affects the child, not the relationship.
Your credibility matters. An honest, restrained approach carries more weight than accusations fueled by anger or hurt. While the partner of an alcoholic suffers greatly, and alcoholism deeply impacts the marriage, for child custody cases, the focus will be on the child’s safety, not the relationship, We encourage all partners who have found themselves in this dynamic to consider participating in Al-Anon. Al-Anon is an organization that helps people who have been impacted by another person's alcoholism.
For Parents Facing Allegations
If you’ve been accused, don’t panic. Instead:
Avoid defensiveness — courts appreciate accountability,
Show consistency and stability in your parenting,
Consider proactive steps like counseling or testing, especially if there’s a past incident,
Keep records of incidents, allegations; document with text messages, emails, photos, and other evidence,
If you are struggling with your alcohol use, consider robust treatment.
Judges are often willing to give parents the opportunity to prove themselves — but you must take it seriously and stay consistent. It is extremely psychologically and emotionally damaging to a child when a parent struggles with alcohol use. Your child deserves a stable and sober parent. Yet, false or overblown allegations are common. Keeping a record can help you prove that the other parent’s allegations are not legitimate.
Final Thoughts
Custody disputes involving alcohol misuse are delicate and high stakes. Whether you’re concerned about your child’s safety or trying to protect your rights as a parent, having the right legal team matters.
At our firm, we help parents present the right evidence, make strategic decisions, and prioritize what matters most: the child’s safety and well-being.
Related reading: 4 Things That Can Be Used Against You In a California Child Custody Battle
Related reading: Why a Strong Declaration Can Make or Break Your Family Law Case in Los Angeles
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Emily Rubenstein Law PC is a full service divorce and family law firm. We proudly serve Beverly Hills, West Hollywood, West Los Angeles, Santa Monica, Culver City, the South Bay, Glendale, Pasadena, Sherman Oaks, Studio City, Encino and all of Los Angeles County.
Give us a call or check out our website:
(310) 750-0827 | www.emilyrubensteinlaw.com